I still remember that afternoon about 6 years ago, when I heard the news that my job was at risk, as headquarters decided to restructure the entire company and our team had to go.
To say it was unsettling would be an understatement: I was only 6 months away from getting my permanent residence in the UK – if I was forced to stop working, it would write off all my previous 4.5 years’ hard work and I would have to start from scratch to collect “points” – not to mention the gloomy job market then.
I could have kept feeling sorry for myself: “This is soooooo unfair. We are such a high-performing team, why us?! Why me, at this point in time?!” And also I could have sucked everyone else around me into this vortex…
But I didn’t.
This was what ACTUALLY happened 6 months later:
+ Instead of locking my eyes on my PC in the evenings , I moved every cell in my body on the dance floor, I learnt 2 new styles of sensual dances (hello, lost femininity) and made a few new friends – one of them “accidentally” helped me start my business 3 years later.
+ I was rewarded with extra lucrative bonuses + got my permanent residence stamp from the Home Office in Croydon just two weeks before my old job disappeared.
+ My relationships with other team members deepened, a few of them are still in my life now – who said you can’t make real friends in the corporate world?
+ The company happily presented me with the option between a generous severance payout and a job offer with a sister company.
How did it all happen?
Well,
:: I didn’t give up my motto of “adding value wherever I am, whomever I’m with”. Despite my circumstance, I actively looked for ways to assist the restructuring and still be of service. What you give out always comes back in one way or another.
:: I trusted that everything will turn out to be OK, and allowed new things to unfold naturally while the old fading away.
:: I learnt how to respect myself more. I DECIDED that stress wasn’t worth it and shook it off on the dance floor, everyday, for 6 months!
I have been asked this question a lot lately: “How can you still attract abundance when you are going through a really difficult time? I feel that abundance is not available to me…”
True – it’s hard to attract abundance during difficult times.
Not because abundance is not there, but we are so preoccupied with our emotional and mental “stuff” – namely patterns and wounds, it’s just tough to recognise abundance and a more aligned way for you to attract it – as long as you can identify blocks like the below you can reverse them a.s.a.p.
1. Falling under the “v-trap”
Let’s face it, when you have a hard time attracting money, support and abundance, it’s tempting to fall under this “victim trap”.
You believe that the reason for your lack is because: you don’t have a degree/you are a single mother/you don’t have a good childhood/your boss is nasty and always bullies you/your spouse never listens/you are too young/you are too old…
In short, your subconscious mind searches for all the “evidence” to convince you that you don’t deserve abundance. If this is happening, it doesn’t matter how many affirmations you do, you won’t activate your divine power.
Here is the simple truth: your circumstance is not who you are, it might be what happened in the past (be as gentle as possible with it), but it doesn’t define you at the present time, nor can it determine your future unless you allow it to.
And the best way to rise above victimhood is to claim your power.
You can start claiming your power by accepting what is it, so:
Forgive everyone who you blamed for getting you into this circumstance (including yourself). Then ask yourself: “hmmm, this is interesting, why did I create this mess? What does my soul want to learn from it?” This way, you shift your vibration immediately, even if the answer doesn’t reveal itself just yet.
Often when you are stuck in a pattern, you forget about how your inner-voice can create a powerful catalyst and get you back on track.
But once you allow the shift to start, you’ll deepen your relationship with ABUNDANCE, and become a magnet no matter where you are in life.
Want to raise your vibration now? Here is playlist I’ve made for you to shift your perception here and now. I am still adding more short and inspiring videos regularly, you can subscribe to my channel here.
To share another story with you:
My friend E was expecting her second baby. Having stopped working in her previous job from her first pregnancy, she had not had an income for two years. “You know, it’s hard for an entire family to live on my husband’s salary. He usually had decent bonuses but not this year, not sure about next year either. Now, the second one is on the way, it is mentally exhausting to think about how to make ends meet, each month…”
I asked her what she enjoyed about her current situation if she could think of any.
E couldn’t think of any initially as her mind was taken over by the anxiety, understandably.
But once she took a long pause and thought of one thing, then another and another…like a flow:
+ “I love going to get groceries with my child, he makes it like a treasure hunt.”
+ “I love that I can grab time here and there to record my kid’s growth and my pregnancy each day.”
+ “I love that despite the fact we are worried about money, we are all healthy and safe.”
+ “I love that my husband’s work place is nearby and he always does his best to be home”…
I asked her to congratulate herself for creating those aspects of her reality, and enjoy this celebration for at least a week.
As a British person, she initially thought this idea was “too much”, but wanting to change her circumstance, she did it anyway and really meant it.
5 days later, I got this text from E:
“I don’t know how, but this idea of becoming a childminder keeps bugging me. I thought why not! This will ease some financial stress for sure, and I love playing with children anyway. We are selling some old furniture, so I can get myself registered and turn our ground floor into a mini-nursery! I guess I will celebrate myself more often going forward.”
You see, the abundance of ideas (not just any random one but good, feasible + change-your-life ones) is everywhere. Whenever you find yourself stuck in the victimhood, take the charge to pause and jump back to the creator’s seat.
2. What you think you want based on others’ expectations
v.s.
what you deeply need
Or it could be that your eyes are on your goal so tightly, your life is taken over by it day and night.
Don’t get me wrong, this method does have its merits when you are crystal clear what you want. But more often than less, we only discover that our “goals” were what we think we ought to want.
This only drives us further away from what we deeply need right now.
For example, many of us think that we want a full-blown launch, as proof to our family/friends: “Look, I have a legitimate business! And I know what I am doing it, how you judged me before was wrong!”
But what you really need is:
+ Just a little bit more healing and better understanding from our family and friends on a day to day basis;
+ A rich yet simple life while serving our clients and community without burning out;
+ The capacity and confidence to deal with whatever comes in our way while keeping our faith in life, love and our divine business…
I have been there myself too, so I know how easy it is to fall under the following “poor-me-syndromes”:
: “Oh manifesting seems to work on others but not me!”
: “All my hard work has been wasted!”
: “I must have attracted the wrong audience!”…
We all do such self-talk from time to time. Lately a few clients have felt this way too (understandably, given how the hype can heavily influence your thoughts at times). They asked me how I managed to turn it around.
Well, sometimes I get more enrolments than expected; while other times, I get less than planned.
But you know what, in the end of the day, it does NOT matter. My business, like a life itself, is still growing regardless…
On my death bed, will I print out a massive spreadsheet and go over all my launch/conversion stats one by one? And beat myself up by analysing which could have been more “successful?”
The answer is self-explanatory.
Instead, I’d think of my community with immense gratitude and sweetness,
“I launched my online business in 2012, started with two subscribers, then attracted a little bit more from there, and more and more…this community accompanied me for my earthy journey this lifetime…We helped, supported and witnessed each other’s growth, and that was pretty cool!”
I really don’t think I’d get bogged down with anything less than that…
That is the true abundance I have, which fortunately I can always count on.
Everything else is just a by-product.
(By the way, I don’t resist by-products if appropriate, as I have a good relationship with them – I don’t cling on to them but appreciate how they can help me fulfill my life.)
Abundance can mean different things to you, at a different time, in a different season.
Only YOU can really experience YOUR relationship with it, nurture this relationship and let it flourish.
And this requires courage and inner-authority.
On that note, I’d love to wrap up this article with a few Tao Te Ching quotes for you to enjoy and savor:
“If you look to others for fulfillment,
you will never truly be fulfilled.
When you realise there is nothing lacking,
the whole world belongs to you…”
“The master observes the world, but stays true to his inner-vision.
He let things come and go;
His heart is as open as the sky.”
“She who is centred in the Tao
can go where she wishes, without danger.
She perceives the universal harmony,
even amid great pain,
because she has found peace in her heart.”
To Abundance,
Yiye
ps, feel free to share this article with your friends/community who need to hear the message.
This is an excerpt of my Money First Aid Kit, if you find this article useful, you’ll enjoy the Kit – you can get your Kit here today!
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Ohhh this is SO relatable. The launch part definitely rang true. I’ve never been able to have a 4 or 5-figure launch which left me feeling deflated, and somewhat of a failure. But then I have to realize I’m not a failure because I’ve given these people tools to transform their lives. I’m still connected with majority of the people who’ve joined the program. And I see them helping others. That means SO much to me. Thank you for this article Yiye, and this beautiful perspective! xx Jessica-Lynn Sage
Yiye, this article of yours arrive in my inbox so timely! I’m in dilemmatic time right now. Now I realize I’ve focused too much on one thing and ”sorry-me” and ignoring other possibilities on the way.
Hey Theo, so glad that it served you!
Great article. Thank you for sharing your knowledge and experiences. I seem to yo-yo between abundance and victim-hence things don’t get any worse, but they don’t get any better! Your articles help move me in a good direction where I feel I can let things unfold and not force them.
Sending you prayers, Amanda, for your beautiful unfolding!
I love reading your blog, Yiye…thank you for the pearls of wisdom. The quotes at the end gave me goosebumps!
I’m so happy that it resonated with you Sarah! Re: the quotes, me too, they gave me chills every time!