[ Edit note: I am now free from PTSD symptoms and also healed from the childhood trauma – much thanks to the Five Element Acupuncture, hanging out in Nature, my ongoing creative projects and body-related training, and my commitment to not abandoning myself. Uplevelling experiences no longer feel intensive or challenging, nowadays I go through them as very natural processes. However, this article documented exactly how I felt at the time, back then it was very difficult. I’ll respectfully let it stay here, as it was true. Thanks for reading, you are not completely on your own, each of us goes through this kind of journey in our own way. If you cannot see the future yet, keep walking, walk further. One day, you will grow out of it, I promise.]
Personally I experience a major uplevelling at least every 3 months – they are very intense to handle. I’m sure I’m not the only one, so I’ve compiled this rich post to help you uplevel your life and business with grace.
1. There is no need to “transcend your ego”
You will experience a high volume of inner critics, and you might feel disconnected with the Source energy, your big vision and your Spirit. In the traditional spiritual sense, these are “ego talks”, and you should “transcend” your ego by default.
Ever tried that? Normally it can work pretty well in the short-term.
During uplevelling? Good luck with that approach!
Psychologically and emotionally, upleveling can be extremely delicate. Your younger selves – the ones who felt misunderstood, confused, never-good-enough-for-somebody, often resist your next step. (Why wouldn’t they – based on what they experienced before?)
Overall you are entering a war zone for all aspects of yourself. To “transcend” the wounded and scared parts of you is to deny your humanity, and will create further conflicts and separation within yourself.
Hiro Boga lovingly reminded us that: “Everything about you is sacred. So many people call their inner selves as ego and try hard to transcend them, but in essence it is their younger selves crying out for help.”
You need love, love and more self-love to calm your younger selves, so that you can get all your subconscious parts (i.e. ego) on board with your next leap.
2. You are likely to work with non-ideal clients more than ever
In the past I had been overwhelmingly lucky with attracting dream clients:
– Attracted pro-bono clients as soon as I registered this domain, and they are really cool people to work with and super appreciative.
– Started charging my services immediately after that; again, manifested wonderful, interesting and amazing clients all over the world to work with. Beautiful results and success stories kept flowing to my inbox.
– My best clients advocate my services with their own friends, circles and on social media.
HOWEVER.
As my online presence grew, I started attracting some bad apples one after another.
There were two extreme cases:
The first girl was not in a good state with her life, which I didn’t mind. I thought, hey, that’s what we are here for, right?
The truth was: I needed twice the time, energy and focus than normal to clear her old programming and hold a loving, clear and non-judgemental space for her. She sent me a glowing “thank-you” letter initially, telling me how much she loved me and appreciated me. Then she suddenly got ill. Instead of seeing her doctor and getting treated, she sent me a nasty note accusing me “using black magic to make her ill”…
You think that’s bizarrely bad huh? Wait until you hear the next story.
As usual, I poured a lot into working with this other person, she found the strategies and mindset training helpful, and even made her initial investment back several times. She kept telling me how much her life and business had changed for the better.
Then, bam! 5 months later, she decided that she needed the Money to do something else so she requested a refund + pretended that she didn’t know about my non-refundable policy.
In order to get what she wanted, she called me every possible name in the book. She cyber-bullied me for 2 months. One day, she even sent me 8 emails just for the sake of lashing out…
First world problems, I know, I know.
It wasn’t life/death and it was only two cases. But at the time it felt like being stabbed in the back by 200 knives.
Due to the intimate nature of my work, it was hard to stay detached and not be involved in their own dramas/patterns.
It was hard not to take it personally.
It was hard not to doubt myself.
It was hard to keep faith.
During uplevelling, everything seems to be murky and misty.
I talked to my teachers and mentors about this (by the way, it was good to know that I wasn’t the only one to experience this), their underlying question was the same:
“How much longer are you willing to put up with such manipulative behaviour?” “Are you prepared to take on this type of people in the future?”
Am I?
Intellectually of course not.
But I did take them on, didn’t I?
In both cases, those two people were almost hunting me down to work with them initially. They both told me something along this line: “Oh, I don’t normally resonate with coaches, but you made me feel so comfortable, I really really resonate with you!”
I was naive and I was flattered.
I didn’t judge them at all. I still don’t. In fact, I have endless compassion for them – living in that way, it cannot be fun or easy.
I sincerely wish that the first person can stand up for herself and release the fear that someone in another corner of the earth who she has never met could even possibly make her ill.
I sincerely wish that the second person can stop behaving like a nagging child, take responsibility for her own action,and when things get tough, ask for help with an appreciative and collaborative manner, not from her default manipulative motive.
I don’t want to stop being compassionate, but it doesn’t mean that I have no right to exercise my discernment.
Our time, our energy and our expertise are reserved for those who take their divinity seriously, who are ready to learn, to absorb and to implement.
Looking back, I can laugh about those encounters now – because some of the name calling and comments were indeed hilarious. And given the ratio is 2 out of 100+, I’m still a lucky one who have been working with amazing clients.
In hindsight, I realised that both cases have mirrored the trauma patterns I had when I was little, especially the second case. This actually provided an incredible healing opportunity and I learnt how to stand up for myself, and stand up for my business.
Are you manifesting some non-ideal situations at the moment? Please don’t beat yourself up.
Stay strong.
Stay in love with your vision.
Here is the truth:
Everything that doesn’t match your next level vibration, will spin off swiftly. It could be your clients, your team members, or even some of your friends and colleagues. This leads to the next point.
3. You will lose certain relationships
It’s sad to let go: friendships, relationships and perhaps more. That’s only the surface. Underneath, you are letting an old aspect of you go.
Uplevelling comes with a form of grieving.
Give yourself enough time to embrace the change.
The good news is that your remaining friendships will become even more authentic and stronger. You know, that type of Essence to Essence, Soul to Soul interactions, which are so soothing, delicious, inspiring and mutually-nurturing. 🙂
4. You will experience this regularly
Once you say: “Yes, I want to grow” to your soul, you can’t go back.
Uplevelling is inevitable during your entrepreneurial journey. Be prepared to experience this at least every 12 months.
There is no short-cut. You might even feel like dying each time. But I promise you that you’ll get better, and you’ll be more skillful to navigate this journey and fall in love with your Essence over and over again.
5. You will need people who “get” you more than ever
When things get wonky, so many people lose their faith and stop there.
It is sad to see this happen. Make sure that your dreams are not killed before you give them a fair chance.
Join a mastermind, seriously.
No one can grow or create miracles by doing everything themselves.
Proactively reach out to form meaningful connections. It doesn’t have to be expensive. You can form your own mastermind.
My soul sisters and I talk and support each other regularly. We help each other clear the fog and hold the bigger picture.
If you struggle to find someone, you are welcome to join my virtual class. The first time I was uplevelling, I had no industry connection, I had no one to turn to. Luckily many amazing audio and videos helped me. I simply wish that I can contribute back to the ripple effect, as now I am more capable to do so.
6. Your root chakra might not feel very rooted
You are shedding your old skin.
The new layer is yet to emerge.
While the old patterns are dissolving, so is your comfort zone – the thoughts, the beliefs, the patterns or even faith that used to keep your safe and comfortable will start to shape into a new form, which is still in the thin air, seems so far away, or perhaps actually close, but you don’t fully recognise it yet.
Your first chakra is delicate.
You need Mother Earth more than ever. Let nature nourish and sustain you. You don’t need to live near a luxury beach or on the top of a mountain all year around. Connecting with your own home, your local cafe, museum, or library regularly can just do a good job.
Grounding saves your a$$. Make this your daily habit.
7. You might have a full-blown Spirit Guides change-over
Admission: this one seriously knocked me out.
I’ve been working with Guides regularly professionally and for my personal life.
Many of them have been with me since I was born and even before that.
They’ve been devoting so much love, energy and guidance to help me grow up in my communist upbringing, and staying true to myself while honouring the system.
Many of them also “travelled” (although in their world there is no need for them to travel at all) with me across the continents, constructing a brand new life in the UK – helping me learn English, adapting to the culture and various life-skills quickly.
In general, I know that some Guides come and go, depending on where you are in life and the specific project you are working on.
For example, I’ve had Guides who helped me to write my first e-book, some left once the initial project was finished. Yet they came back one year later to help me turn it into an E-Course. I felt sad when they left each time but I know that every time I update the course, we’ll reunite again. It was an intimate, but light energy for this type of change over.
However, what I experienced earlier this year was totally different. I heard that some people have had 30-day period Guides change over, or 90 days.
Mine was…well, over 6 months.
At the start, I kept hearing this message from them repeatedly: “Well done. Our job is done. Gradually we will leave soon.”
“Leaving? Why do you mean? I thought that we are going on more adventures together, look at how much we’ve already co-created!”
“Your current template is about to dissolve, new Guides will come and assist you. They will be a better fit.”
“What new Guides?! I don’t want some new Guides! You know how much you mean to me and I want to keep working with you!”
“Take good care. Look forward. The new connections will be beyond wonderful. We are going now.” They said so, and they did.
I was awfully hurt.
You know, it’s a bit like the classic being dumped line.
“It’s not you. It’s me.”
Suddenly, work became less joyful. Life was weird and taken over by PTSD, I never ever felt this disconnected before.
I missed my old Guides. I couldn’t believe that our bonding, connection and relationship suddenly, pooof, gone…Just like that!
Sure, I was overly sentimental. Perhaps, I even co-dependent towards them.
At the soul level, I know that everything has been perfect, beautiful and blissful, the connection formation as well as the breakup.
But, at the human level? Goodness, it was a breakup of three decades (if not lifetimes)…
Soaked up with grief, I spent several months in depression. I had no intention to connect with or even welcome my new Guides either.
…
Fortunately, God will never hand something to you that you cannot handle.
I stumbled into Hiro’s world, and learnt ways to connect directly with Devas (different Essences in our Universe), especially the Essence of Money and Abundance.
As I devoted myself into the wonder and exploration, things got better, and I felt much more connected and more open to receive support. With the help of Essence and Abundance, we co-created a few popular products and rich content.
I was called to go on date with Abundance as often as possible. This has led to many daily miracles (see examples in #9 below).
Day by day, I got better, my PTSD symptoms also eased.
Still, something was missing. Essences are beautiful, pure and vibrate to the highest possible frequency, Guides can act like a bridge giving you practical suggestions to connect more intimately with a particular Essence. While working with the energy of Essence directly was astonishing and profound, I could have more fun with many buddies, helper, assistants and teachers guiding me from the unseen world.
I never stopped missing my old gang, especially when I receive an email from a past client, “remember what you said during the session last year? It’s happening! Can’t believe it!”; or passing a place in central London when last time they whispered to my ear:”Go left” and I followed and found a delightful surprise…
If I knew there was a time-frame with my old gang, I would have enjoyed their company even more. With that thought, I finally opened myself to connect with the new wave of Guides.
And my old gang were right, the new ones are truly powerful, swift yet gentle. In hindsight, it was so humbling to experience this change-over despite how hard it was.
I want to take this opportunity to express my gratitude to my old Guides + release my sentiments, as well as officially thank my new Guides for your glorious patience and unconditional love.
My experience was unique, but I cannot be the only one. If by sharing mine, it helps you, I will be glad.
8. You will feel more scared than ever
There is no need to pretend otherwise.
Give yourself permission to explore what really is underneath your deep fears.
If required, go dark, go deep.
If you want to cry, then cry. If you need to blow off steam, go ahead.
But please don’t delve in your shadow forever. Make sure you do #9 too…
9. Honouring your healing wishes, miracles shall follow.
I’m a Scorpio, and I just turned 31. Since last year, I’ve been going through my first Saturn Return and Saturn is still retrograding in Scorpio (translation in non-astrological terms = double pressure).
If you were in a similar position, I sincerely wish you didn’t feel as f^ked up as I did!
One day in early Oct, I was shopping for gifts for friends. I came across three beautiful birthday cards.. Well, I never ever bought myself birthday cards (or any cards). But the women on the cards looked so confident, sexy and classy, I felt pulled towards those beautiful images and vibes. I bought them all, for myself – why not, it has been a challenging year!
I was very happy with my choice. When I got home, I invoked my new Guides and invited them to write loving, assuring and encouraging messages for me.
As I was channelling the messages, I immediately felt at peace.
I also decided to turn my birthday into a full month long celebration (I’m still celebrating it as I write this).
18 hours later, I received a “random” email from a studio that I subscribed to 3 years ago.
An invitation for a complimentary photo-shoot session (including hair & makeup and a free digital print).
Da-dahhh. Self-love always breeds more love into your life!
Of course, I said yes to the invitation. I knew that it would give me so much joy that I was craving for.
The whole experience was smooth, fun and joyous. I enjoyed it so much, I ended up taking more photos than the initial complimentary one, but I’m cool with that, I always enjoy giving Money love to people who make your life better. In the end, but they offered me a big 50% discount on the additional photos – just because!
(I took a lot more…)
Here is another example where honouring your healing wish pays off.
A few weeks earlier, I felt that something was missing in my life – the inner geek- to my surprise too!
Firstly, the inner geek wasn’t fully expressed. It felt itchy and was in need of opportunities to be scratched.
Secondly, I wanted to spend more time to look into systems, logic reasoning and intellectual teaching to balance my over-heated right brain.
This year, as many of you know, my soul has been walking in the fire, burnt and inflamed. Unleashing my inner geek was my healing ice.
Guess what, within 24 hours, I manifested a B2B client “out of the blue”, and the scope of the work was in total alignment with my healing wishes.
I poured over on the contract with gratitude and intensity for a few days (I always prefer intensity), a lot of pain from point #2 above has been soothed + eased, which has given me more courage and space to bring more creative expressions to my online work in the long run.
Don’t get stressed out by where the Money is then force yourself to do something that doesn’t feel right. Go where the healing is, and allow the Money to support you on the way.
To clear the fog during uplevelling, your healing wish always brings you miracles and clarity.
Go deeper than deep. Your answer is never outside.
For those who are fairly new to manifesting, don’t get discouraged by my 24 hour turnaround. Behind those 24 hours was years of practice and accumulation. Start here and now, it will pay off!
10. Your new expressions will find you
“Being “in the gap” can be disorienting and even scary. Nothing to hold on to, no sense of direction, not even a hint of what choices and possibilities might lie ahead. But it was just this state of pure potential that existed before the universe was created. Relax into the no-thingness…fall into this silence between the words…watch the gap between the outgoing and incoming breath. And treasure each empty moment of the experience. Something sacred is about to be born.” –OSHO
Need I say more?
Trust.
11. Honey, there is nothing wrong with you
You are not the only one, we’ve all gone through/are going through this.
While working through your own stuff, you can view yourself very differently, you might lose confidence, sanity or even hope. I want to gently remind you this: that version of you is NOT the full picture. You might even want to give up on having a business that allows you to be intimate with people, dig into their deep issues and help them move forward otherwise they cannot do it themselves.
If you feel this way, honour your feeling, but I want to remind you over and over again: this is not the full picture of your business. Find a way to make it work, even if that means gradually, slowly, or part-time, don’t give up on yourself.
The world will thank you for not giving up.
I sincerely thank everyone who ever left me thoughtful and kind comments, emails and social media shout outs, for generously echoing back that my work matters, for being a believing eye for my own uplevelling journey.
On closing this article, I simply wish that I’ve served as your believing eye on yours.
If you can think of someone who can benefit from this article, please do send it to them.
All my love,
Yiye! What an authentic write up! So comforting and encouraging, even knowing that I am not on my own is a HUGE help. I just want to let you know that I genuinely enjoy reading your posts. Thank you so much!
Thanks for taking your time Khoa, I appreciate your presence and kind words too 🙂
Dear Yiye,
No words can describe how I’m feeling and how this post resonates.
Thank you for sharing and I’m grateful to know that we are not alone going through this process.
Big hugs and Blessings to you🤗🙏🏻🌷💕
Thank you Lisa so much, so glad you resonate! <3
Thank you. Loads of inspiration there.
I’ve been exploring my humanness in depth the past week!
I only consciously connected with my Invisibles about six months ago. I wish I had done so at age 30, half a lifetime ago.
Much to think about, I’ll be back rereading this one.
Love, Nancy
Dear Nancy,
Thanks for your thoughtful comment. I’m so glad that this article is serving you. Sending you lots of love.
Yiye
Thank you so much for this blogpost! It helped my a lot in my current life situation. Some time ago I had literally to give up everything in order to start a “new life”. Although I know a bit something about the reason it was difficult to embrace the change, as it took my successful career, money, relationships etc. away from me. I didn’t for example understand why I have to stay at home for such a long time and don’t meet new people and why I still feel this sadness sometimes, your post helped! But I know I am on the right track: meanwhile I got married to my true soulmate and our first child will be born in 4 weeks. Her name will be “life”. 🙂
I’m so happy to hear that this article served you Fabienne! Sending you & your beautiful family lots of good vibes!
Uplevelling comes with a form of grieving.
I could not agree more. It is a knowing, for me, that things will not be the same.
Great, great, great post! I can completely resonate with it right now and did my whole day of crying, and surrendering, and facing my growth last week. I think I’m still processing. Completely scary. Completely wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing, I sincerely appreciated and enjoyed every word of this! Jessica <3
Thank you for sharing your experience too Jessica! It is never easy to sit with our own stuff but all proccesses are sacred. Much love
Thank you Yiye! Your advice and wisdom have helped me so much along my path. And although I’m not a business entrepreneur what you post applies so much to my life in general. Many blessings of gratitude 🙂 You shine so brightly!
Hi Jenni – lovely to hear from you again! Good to know that you’ve found it helpful!
Love & Abundance,
Yiye
Dear Yiye,
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. Uplevelling can be so hard and disorienting and it’s nice to know that I’m not alone when I enter these cycles. I believe that are meant to make us stronger.
You are such a beautiful teacher.
xo
You are so welcome Christian! Always glad to be of service, especially for gorgeous & courageous souls like yourself! And yes, it’s true that we are never alone,
Love & Abundance,
Yiye
love this post! Thank you so much for sharing 🙂
Thanks for dropping by Nadia, glad to know that you enjoyed it!